This time of year can feel full on and hectic. There seems to be a never-ending list of demands to try and meet the needs of other people. It can feel too much.
And that’s not to mention the shopping, planning, cooking, entertaining, wrapping, cards, family and potential worries about money.
I don’t think anyone likes to be angry.
I’d hazard a guess and say that most people are scared of anger, whether it’s being angry or facing someone else’s angry emotions and actions. They just don’t like it. One reason is that anger makes you feel vulnerable. At other times it evokes feelings of guilt and shame impacting your sense of self and self-esteem.
And anger can feel like a dangerous thing. That’s because it can be.
Christmas isn’t fun for everyone.
There are many reasons why you might not be looking forward to it.
Last time I wrote about 7 Ways Why Mindfulness Can Make You A Better Lover. If you missed part one of the series of click here to read that now.
Mindfulness is a wonderful meditation practice which helps integrate your mind, body and soul. What you cultivate with mindfulness is ‘presence’. You become aware of what is happening as it is happening. And what’s amazing about that, is your brain and body become more connected with other peoples.
Hard to imagine that sitting quietly and focusing on the breath for as little as 20 minutes a day can improve your love life.
But hear me out, practising mindfulness can help make you a better lover and life partner.
We all have a past. It’s part of the unique story that makes you who you are.
Being overly preoccupied with the past perhaps isn’t helpful; but there are undoubtedly important things from your history which, when worked through, can help you fully experience the present and look forward to enjoying a future filled with rewarding relationships.
I often notice with clients how difficult it often is for them to connect with any childhood wounding.
Telling the story can feel like a betrayal of a parent, particularly if they identify with difficulties in their parent’s story. For example, if the parent was ill, abandoned by a partner, suffered bereavement, or had their own history of trauma. It’s often easy is to connect with and understand the parents’ hurt.
But, what this means is leaving the experience of the child (you) out of the story.