Christmas isn’t fun for everyone.
There are many reasons why you might not be looking forward to it.
Last time I wrote about 7 Ways Why Mindfulness Can Make You A Better Lover. If you missed part one of the series of click here to read that now.
Mindfulness is a wonderful meditation practice which helps integrate your mind, body and soul. What you cultivate with mindfulness is ‘presence’. You become aware of what is happening as it is happening. And what’s amazing about that, is your brain and body become more connected with other peoples.
Hard to imagine that sitting quietly and focusing on the breath for as little as 20 minutes a day can improve your love life.
But hear me out, practising mindfulness can help make you a better lover and life partner.
We all have a past. It’s part of the unique story that makes you who you are.
Being overly preoccupied with the past perhaps isn’t helpful; but there are undoubtedly important things from your history which, when worked through, can help you fully experience the present and look forward to enjoying a future filled with rewarding relationships.
I often notice with clients how difficult it often is for them to connect with any childhood wounding.
Telling the story can feel like a betrayal of a parent, particularly if they identify with difficulties in their parent’s story. For example, if the parent was ill, abandoned by a partner, suffered bereavement, or had their own history of trauma. It’s often easy is to connect with and understand the parents’ hurt.
But, what this means is leaving the experience of the child (you) out of the story.
Shh. It’s National Quiet Day.
It’s getting more and more difficult to create a space for solitude and silence. The noise it seems is an inevitable part of our day.
And I’m not even sure if, collectively as a society, we know how to experience peace and quiet anymore.
London has the highest levels of noise in the UK. Living in London, I guess I’ve got used to the noise. Traffic, emergency vehicles, people chatting loudly on mobile phones, barking dogs and car alarms are familiar and all rate highly as annoying to adults in the UK.
But the noise doesn’t have to be loud.
An affair leaves a trail of pain, hurt and guilt in its wake. There’s no escaping that.
Infidelity is the ultimate betrayal. Whether you stay together or not, an affair marks an ending in the relationship. All of a sudden, the spell of the romantic phase is well and truly broken.
Betrayal threatens your emotional safety. It shakes any sense of a secure attachment. The anger and hurt emotionally split you apart.
Inevitably, things won’t be the same again. How you relate to each other, communicate, how you trust each other and how intimate you are all change.